Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Looking in the mirror

Well, I am finally taking a few minutes for a new post. I'm sharing an experiment I'm trying. As a new mommy, I'm not necessarily happy with what I see in the mirror right now. My face if very full and I haven't had a hair cut for months. So, when I took a minute to read a suggestion on Oprah.com, it sounded like something worth trying. One writer there recommended taking a break from looking in the mirror to see how we feel at the end of the break. Hopefully, we will appreciate ourselves a bit more. So, I'm giving it a try. I'm not looking in a mirror until Saturday. So for the next 3 to 4 days, I'll post how it goes. Right now I'm thinking putting on mascara and fixing my hair are going to be a challenge. But, I'll either skip them, or try to do them without looking. I didn't put makeup on to take my Kindergartener to school today, and I didn't dry my hair yet, I simply pulled it back to make the drive to the school. So it begins. I am not committed to makeup everyday, but I do wear it MOST days. The hair thing is something else. I feel better when I think my hair looks decent. OK . . . I like it to look much better than decent. But then, I won't know WHAT it will look like. We'll see. :)

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Kindergarten? Already??!

What a summer! My youngest started demanding to sit on the potty. The middle boy figured out how to get on the swing, start swinging, and pump . . . by himself. And even though the oldest boy knows he's going to break my heart and go to Kindergarten this fall, he still insisted on beginning to read and riding a two wheeler, all in the same week that he was moved to his own room without so much as hesitation or question of readiness. Crazy. My head is still spinning. I know they must grow up, but do they have to cram so much into a summer? A month? A week, even?

Now we have Kindergarten to face. And he's already telling me he'd prefer the handy "kiss-n-go" lane rather than have me get out and walk him to his class line. He's boldly ready to face this next adventure, and I'm sitting here thinking, "Perhaps I could homeschool through Kindergarten and he could begin all this in another year or so!"

But, I am so proud, too. Proud to be a mom of three awesome kids. Proud to know they are loved and feel safe to go out into the world. Proud to be a mom. And that really is what I love. Being a mom. With all the challenges and tough days. I really do love it!

Friday, February 17, 2006

What's in a name?

I'm new at this (blogging, not being a Mamma), so I begin writing with reservation in the first place. Will I be able to do this? Will it be worth my time? Is it worth it to put my words and thoughts out there into cyber space? But, even with all this newness, I can't believe how much anxiety I felt simply trying to come up with names for things while creating this blog. What username did I want to get stuck remembering everytime I sign in? What did I want plastered at the top of this page to be seen by me and anyone else who ever stops by? What should I put as my signature to be seen any time I post something new here or elsewhere in the blogging community?

Why on Earth am I feeling so much pressure to be clever and witty? Isn't this just a blog? A web site for venting my thoughts on motherhood and how that life goes with my life as a friend, wife, daughter, sister, human being? Don't I have much larger problems to ponder, like whether I've figured the budget accurately for the month? Or whether I've thought of all the great birthday gift ideas I could for my loving hubby? And if it is going to be so stressful for me to come up with simple labels for my blog . . . am I up to the challenge of helping to name a 4th person? As this tiny baby grows inside me, I once again begin to swell with the responsibility and joy of adding to our family.

Wait, that might be it . . . those hormones are making me a bit more sensitive to decision making, even the tiny and trivial. Or, I'm just tired. Oh, it is just a few hours from bed time . . . so sleep is near, and for now, I give up my attempt to be funny, clever, witty, smart, creative, novel. For now, I'm just going to leave things as they are. Including my title, Mamma on the Edge. It fits, and I promise to write about it more later.